Harmony Through Conflict [Guest Post]

souls-at-play.pngThis is a touching and deep guest post by Trish Lay who is a Professional Life/Leadership Coach and runs SoulsAtPlay.

When I was three years old, my adoptive mother was holding me as we stood in line at the grocery store.  A gentleman in front of us turned and said what a pretty little girl I was…I then replied with, “no I’m not…I’m adopted.”

Being adopted weighed on my shoulders for decades.  Rejection and Abandonment coursed through my veins.  My adopted father rejected me…and the words “if you don’t behave yourself, we’ll take you back and get another baby…” haunted my core being.

Searching for my birthparents began when I was 14 and ended when I was 25.  My birthmother, due to her own issues, rejected me once again.  After being raped, wrestling with my suicidal demons, and facing cellular rejection for the second time, I decided I would no longer play the victim in my own story.  I chose life, to take responsibility for myself and be accountable.  At that time, it became incredibly clear my birthmother was just the vessel to get me here; God had a much bigger plan for me, even before I arrived into this world.

So began the pursuit to create the foundation I am built on.  Truly believing in my heart of hearts that if you change the negative mind patterns set by circumstances and individuals in the past, a shift will occur.  Deciding people and experiences don’t define a person; I began to mold, transform and listen to my inner personal power and pulled my head out of the dark cellular abyss and started to believe I was a woman of worth. Granted, my resistance and horoscope stubbornness continues to be tested and constantly will as the cycle of life moves forward.

As a firm believer of street smarts vs. book smarts, I pounded the pavement searching for answers to my personal healing.  Before I could lead anyone to themselves, I needed to lead myself first.  After massive consumption of information it all led back to: Trust, Forgiveness, Compassion, Integrity, and Love.

After years of informally coaching and being a professional sounding board for others, I decided to put my years of crazy life experiences, of which my friends titled “My Life Is a Chick Flick,” into action.  My constant intention daily is the vision of leading just one person to change and help them learn to love themselves without judgment or guilt, shame or humiliation.   If I can inspire myself through love, faith, integrity and laughter why can’t I do that for others?  We were all brought here to give something back in one way or another and I want to leave this earth better than when I arrived.

As the consciousness of people change, folks like Life Coaches, Professional Motivators, and Lifestyle Coordinators are in need.  Currently, I am designing A LEADERSHIP PROGRAM FOR TEENS to reach High School youth nationwide.  It is my belief we should operate on the theory that every child has the capacity for leadership in one way or another.  Young individuals resist being told what to do.  They love to be inspired and motivated; in other words, they love to be led.  The statistics of troubled teens is on the rise.  The need for compassion, understanding and inspiration is desired among young individuals. All they want is to be heard, loved, and told “you rock!,” at the same time providing an atmosphere of safety.

Surviving life because of my sense of humor and ability to deal with what is in front of me; that strength gives me the ability to talk and listen to people from a real place and a patient perspective.

With sincere gratitude for my trials and challenges, every moment has led me to where I stand right now.  Because of those moments my foundation of “who am I” was created. Through MAJOR forgiveness…I am able to give an honest approach of compassion and empathy to those I encounter daily.  And with a chameleon-like perception, I am able to reach people on their ground.

Everyday is an experience and a choice.  Everyday brings up issues for us to look at.  Once you are aware of those issues, you can identify them, bless them and let them go.  There is a much higher power that protects us, if we let it.  We are all blessed with a story – a beginning and an ending – how will you write your story?  What will your legacy be?

Trish Lay is a Professional Life/Leadership Coach. For more information visit her website at: www.SoulsAtPlayProductions.com.  Or contact her directly at:  TrishLay@gmail.com

No Responses to “Harmony Through Conflict [Guest Post]”

  1. Lin
    March 24, 2008 at 3:54 pm #

    Hi Trish,

    What a sad but inspiring story to tell, and a great example of how we have the choice to turn sorrow and pain around and grow and evolve despite adversities experienced as children. Thank you for sharing your story.

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