Love and Friendship

Gema is an 19-year old from Miami, FL. She loves reading and writing young adult fiction and claims to pass out in the presence of sterile wit.A couple in the dark by Carlo Nicora.

I know many girls (the one in the mirror included) that went through the “boy crazy” phase. Crushes were numbered and categorized by degree of attraction and boyfriends were used up and discarded with a trail of complaints stuck to the soles of their shoes. False logic proved to girls that boys could never be “just friends”. Every time someone so much as smiled at them, the imagination would jumpstart images of the two holding hands, kissing and so on.

I theorize that the reason for the constant dashes to the romantics is that a lot of teens don’t acknowledge the difference between a friend and a boy/girlfriend. At the very least, I’m the only one with enough face left to admit that used to be my problem.

When both are healthy relationships, love and friendship are notably similar. There’s a profound respect for one person that is mirrored back to the other. There’s trust. There’s honesty. And there are no strings attached to any of these prior conditions. They exist for the sake of the other.

In fact, the line separating true love and true friendship is so thin it could be confused for a runway model. However, just like a runway model, it still exists, no matter how thin it is.

Friendship is beautiful because it’s something you can have with many people without putting loyalty at risk. “Love” is the love of a friend on a powerful catalyst. It’s a love that inspires blushes and giggles as it does trust and respect. It’s wanting to get closer though holding hands and kisses without losing the foundation, which is friendship.

The similarities between friendship and love are the reasons why I advocate being a friend before being someone’s girlfriend (or boyfriend). That’s where you work on building trust and respect with a person while getting to know them.

So analyze the people around you. Are you confusing friends for love? Are your friends meeting the qualifications of a good friend? Figure these things out and then proceed.

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