How to be Cool (Parents only)

Ichien is 17 years old from New York City. During her free time, she can be found in the midst of crowded streets shopping, going to a movie theater, filming, reading or writing. She has a passion for filming and writing and hopes that one day she can make use of her passion to inspire the world.

Every teen wants a cool parent: a mother who is chic and stylish and knows the latest trends or a father who is laid-back and not overprotective. You probably wonder why it is so hard to connect with your teen or why it is so difficult to become your teen’s best friend. You don’t have to be a celebrity parent to be considered “cool.” Any parent can be considered cool in their teen’s eyes.

Here are some tips to becoming part of the “In” crowd:

1. Moms should appear presentable.

Daughters prefer mothers to dress in an appealing way. Sometimes you can go shopping with your daughter. This way not only your daughter can have an input in the way you dress, but also it could be a chance for the two of you to have some bonding time. First impressions are important in society. If your teen’s friends think your cool, then your teen will believe that you’re cool. We care about what our friends think.

2. Dads need to relax once in awhile.

When you meet your daughter’s date, please don’t constantly interrogate the poor boy. There is also no need to be grumpy and cynical. Honestly, it gives off a sense that you don’t trust your daughter to bring home a right guy. Not only that but it also makes the moment awkward. If you want to see if the guy has any secret intentions, ask him a few questions but make it subtle. For example, ask him about his hobbies and interests because usually it can tell what kind of person they are.

3. Don’t be overprotective Dad.

Continuing the scenario from before; If your teen especially your daughter might be a tad late, don’t go crazy on her or else all you will hear is screaming, slamming doors, and silent treatment. If she didn’t call you to tell you she was going to be a bit late, she was probably enjoying her time with her date.  Don’t ruin her night by yelling, please.

4. No corny jokes allowed.

When friends come over, don’t start making corny jokes because it’ll create an awkward silence. Then your teen will be embarrassed by you and feel the need to disassociate with you when friends are around

5. To be cool means to understand about your teen’s generation.

The present is different from the past. That means your teen’s generation dresses, acts and thinks completely differently than your generation. The easiest way to fit in is to research about what’s “in” right now for teens and what’s popular for teens nowadays. We want to be able to share our common interests with parents and we want to be able to feel comfortable talking to our parents about anything. This could eventually be the start of a new relationship.

Being cool and becoming friends with your teens is great but always be a parent first. Don’t be too friendly or bend the rules just to avoid your angry or out of control teen. However, sometimes you need to stop controlling or dictating your teen’s life especially with an older teen. If you believe that you taught your teen the right morals and values, all you can do is now is guide them in the right direction and trust that they will make the right decision. If they make mistakes, that’s part of life and it’s part of the learning process for them to mature and grow up.

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