Double Trouble: How To Deal with Teen Twins

sibling rivalry, twins, teenage twins, siblings, sibling jealousy,Margo is a 16- year-old from Winnetka, Il.  She loves doing improv, working for her school’s newspaper and being with her friends.  Her favorite subject is English because writing is her passion.


From the womb to the classroom, twins are born comparing themselves to each other.  Whether it’s boys, school, sports or social life, twins are always trying to one up the other.  For parents with twins, it is important to know that no matter how tough your teens seem, there is always something in the back of their mind wondering if their twin has succeeded over them.

As a teenager with a twin sister, I have had many years of practice when it comes to dealing with the comparison of grades.  When my mom would pick us up from school and ask how the math test went, I was always prepared to hear my sister’s perfect score.  Although it is not always easy to have a twin sister with an outstanding GPA, I have to come to learn that it is not a competition.  But, when my parents are checking in to make sure I have studied, while they leave my sister alone to do as she pleases, that is when having a twin gets tough.  It is important to know that there is nothing worse than being compared to your twin sister or brother when it comes to school.  Everyone is different and just because you are twins, doesn’t mean you have the same strengths.

Ever since I can remember, my twin sister and I have always had different friends.  While she was out playing kickball with her pals, my friends and I were painting our nails.  This can be challenging.   Parents are always worried about who their teenagers are hanging out with, and if one twin seems to have friends that get into less trouble than the other, they might start dropping hints.  One of the most irritating things a parent can say to a twin is “why can’t your friends be more like your sister’s?”.  Even if you are thinking it, try your hardest to respect your daughter or son’s judgment when it comes to their social group.

Teens go through enough without having to worry about living up to their twin.  It is important for parents to treat their twins without comparing them to one another.  For the least amount of stress possible, a life without comparisons and competition is the way to go.

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One Response to “Double Trouble: How To Deal with Teen Twins”

  1. Jenny Rose
    March 30, 2012 at 10:26 am #

    Thank you for your insight! I am a new mom of 15 month old twin boys. I know I have a ways to go before they’re teenagers but I’m trying to learn early so I don’t mess up! :)

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